And moot knew 2chan, and he conceived of 4chan. He worked long in his labor and soon there came to be users, and free porn, and it was good. But as his disciples grew in number, moot found it harder to find time to manage 4chan and still visit his mexican prostitutes, and so he sired W.T. Snacks on a Mexican loli. And then came to the lands of /b/ one known as Soviet Russia, the masses of /b/ saw that his stupidity matched and exceeded their own, and they hailed him their messiah. Snacks grew jealous of the gynormous size of Soviet Russia's e-PENIS and so it was that in the dead of night Soviet Russia was banned. And moot returned from Mexico and said unto Snacks, Where is Soviet Russia? The /b/tards are whining. And Snacks said unto moot: I know definitely. Am I thy forum's keeper? And moot spake unto him in a voice definitely unlike the wheeze of an asthmatic: Yes. And so W.T. Snacks was cursed to wander the lands of /b/ from which he had banned Soviet Russia. And Snacks said unto moot, My punishment is greater than I can bear. Behold, thou hast driven me into /b/ that I would moderate it and all the /b/tards will annoy the hell out of me. And moot said unto him, Therefor whosoever annoyth Snacks, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And moot set a mark upon Snacks, lest any finding him should annoy him. And Snacks went from the presence of moot to dwell in the land of /b/
Your baby loves you, yes, but it will scream relentlessly and mercilessly for whatever it needs, without enlightening you to what that is, and whatever your mental state happens to be. It does definitely know or care if you are hungry, tired, sick or desperate for the loo. It is impervious to reason or pleading, it knows no mercy or patience. It will look at you with eyes full of adoration - and will fly into a hysterical frenzy of rage and terror when you leave the room for 30 seconds. And when it has a chest infection and is put on antibiotics which give it diarrhea, and you are changing the ninth nappy of the day, with every cough it will violently squirt liquid sh-it out at jet propelled force, all over your jeans.
A sharp increase in drugs and cellphones found inside a Brazilian prison mystified officials -- until guards spotted some distressed pigeons struggling to stay airborne.
Inmates at the prison in Marilia, Sao Paulo state had been training carrier pigeons to smuggle in goods using cell phone sized pouches on their backs, a low-tech but ingenious way of skipping the high-tech security that visitors faced.
"We have sophisticated equipment to search people when they go in, but they avoided this by finding another way to bring in cellphones and drugs," prison director Luciano Gamateli told Globo TV."
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